My journey from 2014 to the U.S. presidency of 2024; a step by step memoire.
Here I am: Just turned 30, started a good, broke up with the ex about a month ago, $40,000 debt of which $34,000 are student loans, and I’m sitting in an apartment all by myself in a small town where nothing is open 24 hours. Lack of internet here makes me antsy, like withdrawals. I’ve lost whatever it is that makes my mind focus. The passion I once felt for creating and building things is gone. The highs I used to get from drugs are gone. I don’t think I am any longer capable of feeling the feeling of love for another person and I don’t feel like I’ll ever find someone I find as interesting as drugs.
It started when I was in the military, a little bit of cough syrup at the end of the day to help go to sleep, so I can wake up early enough in the morning and make it to muster on time and not look like a dirt bag. Then there was the sleeping pills, 100 count bottles. I was mixing 8 to 10 sleeping pills with liquor to get to sleep. My freezer had no food in it, only bottles of liquor. Rarely did I drink with other people. I drank alone 98% of the time.
A few days after getting out of the military I tried marijuana for the first time. It was magnificent! It was the greatest feeling I had ever felt. It was so intense that I could see and feel the music coming out of the car speaking of the car I was in the back seat of.I knew without a doubt that if I had marijuana, I would never drink again. I was a little upset though; I had seen several of my friendss/coworkers get kicked out of the military for popping on a drug test for pot. They lost out on their benefits, all because of this substance that makes people happy, well, most people.
A few years after getting back home from the military I had two semi-serious relationships and one casual relationship that decimated me. I rebounded from them with copious amounts of alcohol and drugs. First there was Victoria. A casual relationship, we were dating, but I was so attracted to her I was head over heals with stupidity. She was everything I wanted physically, she was petite with dark hair and a cute face. I would spend all my money on her and not think twice about it. I was so excited about her that I was on cloud nine. Her ex, with whom she broke up with about a month before, would text her or leave messages laced with threats and cursing several dozen times a day. In mid December, she told me she was going to Los Angeles to visit some family members. Three days after she left I was looking for a Christmas gift for her and I got a call from her phone. It was her ex. Thinking she was kidnapped I raced over to her brother’s house, where she was staying. I told them that she was kidnapped by her crazy ex and they looked at me funny; they said that she went back to him. Apparently she was taking a shower at his apartment when he went through her phone and purse. I was so incredibly hurt and mad. My mind went to some very dark places after that; unspeakably dark. Then astounding happened; half way between her brother’s house and where I was living there was a murder suicide. It was a domestic dispute where the female wanted to leave and then her boyfriend killed her then himself. I will always remember that because our houses were less than 3 miles apart and the guy was the same age as me and the girl was the same age as Victoria. It was in that moment I began to believe that the power of thought has the ability to manifest in certain ways. I spent the next several weeks in a fog. Some days it would take several hours between waking up and getting out of bed. They tried to make me go to rehab but I won’t go go go. The first serious relationship was with Kristie. She was another one who was drop dead gorgeous, and she had a personality larger than life. When that relationship went to crap, I went back to my first love, marijuana. There was also many nights getting drunk at the bar and stumbling home. Driving too, I ended up catching a case of wet and reckless. One night at the bar I was talking to a beautiful lady 12 years older than me, I went in for the drunken kiss, but she [Stephanie] turned her head and I got her cheek. We went on to have a fun relationship over the next few months; we smiled so much that our faces hurt. When it was over I went back to marijuana, pills, alcohol, whippets, and psychedelics. For 2 years I didn’t see anyone; just getting high and going to the gym. I kept to myself. Victoria is now a lesbian in the military. Stephanie is now married. And Kristie has since moved away and shacked up with the guy who was her “best friend” when we were together.
My most recent relationship deteriorated after a year; I believe I have lost the ability to love another person. I’ll never feel the butterflies again. I ended up spinning a web of lies that eventually I just gave up lying and told the truth, like in the final scenes of that Denzel Washington movie: Flight. We are close friends now and on good terms.
So now I’m 30 with no success to speak of and no social life to take part in. I work for the government at a prison and I’m depressed. Depressed not only because my relationships don’t work but the drugs also no longer work. Just one sleeping pill and I’m groggy all next morning. Drinking alone is just sad and doing whippets at 30 years of age is just super sad. McDonald’s is my new addiction, but I refuse to ever get fat so it is a battle I’ll win. Now I’m empty and I can’t feel feelings any more. My bipolar medication keeps me level but numb, without it I would be a mess. The only thing I have left in life is legacy. What will I be remembered for and how can I make the world a better place before I die?
What will history remember of me 200 years from now? as it stands: it won’t. History quickly forgets about your love, heartache, the money you made, the house you had, and the car you drove. History will only remember what you did for humanity, and that is the only real focus I have left; it only relies on me and no one else. Right now my legacy is nothing, not a damn thing. I will only be remembered by my family, and I couldn’t ask for a better family, but legacy is different from family.
So I make this proclamation: I’m going to win the presidency of 2024, exactly 10 years from now. I won’t campaign or engage in politics. I will be elected because between now and then I will accomplish 2 very important things that will change the face of our country for the better.
ONE: I am going to fix the education system.
TWO: I am going to fix the prison system.
There are two things you need to know for sure right now.
ONE: Impossible as it may seem, it is not impossible so there exists a series of events that will make it happen, and I’m going to figure it out.
TWO: If you find a solution to one, you will touch on the solution for the other! The key is about getting people to care.
My plan is just a plan; nothing is really going yet. So I’m starting this blog to keep my thoughts focused and to give you insight into the process as it happeens. Two outcomes exists, either I’m elected President, or I go into obscurity.
If I’m elected, then that means I have delivered on my two promises before ever being considered for the presidency. The best solutions are bottom up solutions, not top down, and the best possible outcome is one in which America is number one in the world once again. Higher education will graduate citizens with zero student debt and a fervent business mentality to grow America’s gross domestic production. The broken prison system will create parolees who take care of their kids, community, and country. These two will combine to create a workforce with a universal desire to make America number one in the world once again.
I am but just a guy. I don’t subscribe to any politics. I believe democracy is broken, the government is too fat and slow, and Americans are too happy with their possessions to care. I’ll be blogging periodically about my plans and progress. Join me.
Patriotism is antiquated, we need to brush off the cobwebs.